Adrienne Teeley
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​​McSweeney's Internet Tendency:
​The Resistance Will Be Led By Mary Kay Sales Reps

Reductress:
Get Him To Notice You By Being A Small Clump Of Cells In A Uterus 

Wow! This Woman Is Reaching Out To All The Girls She Bullied In High School To Sell Them Skincare Products

Holy Fucking Shit! This Woman's Teacup Has A Swear Word On It!

6 Oversized Inflatable Rafts That Would be So Fun If You Had A Pool Or Friends

4 Plants That Purify The Air In Your Home But Won't Help With The Weed Stank

Woman At The Local Skating Rink Is Not Fucking Around Here [headline only]

Sparkly Dresses Perfect for New Year's Eve, Or Any Other Time You Want Attention [headline only]

How I Use Movement To Show Everyone In This Coffee Shop I Teach Yoga [headline only]

Wow! This Woman Had Multiple Orgasms Over The Course Of Several Months [headline only]

Vulture:
I Invented the World's First Menstruating Drone

CollegeHumor:
5 Festive Tips For Your Grown-Out Bush Reveal Party

​4 Sexy AF Gowns To Wear To Your Intimate Family Wedding

The Billfold:
What To Do When Your Wallet Is Stolen 

​The Hairpin:
Lace Underwear That Was Sexy Until All Your Pubes Poked Through It

The Belladonna:
Not Dealing With All The Old Shit From My Childhood Bedroom Lets Me Live More Authentically 

​I Think You Are Sexy And That Is What Love Is, By Ed Sheeran

I Rule This Axe Throwing Venue That Happens To Be Perfect For Corporate Parties

Ravishly:
8 Things This Bottle Of Aloe Vera Drink Will Definitely Do For Me
​
The Higgs Weldon:
My Son Drank Windex And Now Has Second Sight

​Hey Facebook Friends, Here's My Wound!

Robot Butt:
​Sex Tip: Touch His Dick To Make Him Go Wild In Bed
​

Can You Get The Property Brothers The Fuck Out Of My House?

Weekly Humorist:

We, the Leaders of the Beef Industry, Have Invented Our Own Impossible Burger

Elon Musk Brainstorms More Ways to Help During the Pandemic

Thank You For Attending This Memorial Service, Please Vote On November 6th

Would You Like To Work At Our Start Up?

​Dry January Activities That Don't Require Alcohol, Just An Unwavering Commitment To
​Fighting Injustice In The Figure Skating Community


I Bought An Exercise Ball For My Desk And Now It's Easier Than Ever To Masturbate At Work

Points in Case:
I Love Wearing My Backpack During Busy Commutes

Frequently Asked Questions About Our Controversially Heavy Weighted Blankets

​
Submittable:
It's Time For My Weekly Writing Newsletter And I Have Nearly Given Up
  • About
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